Scottish Catholic Observer

What would the world be, once bereft

Of wet and wilderness? Let them be left. O let them be left,

O let them be left, wildness and wet,

Long live the weeds and the wilderness yet. (Inversnaid—GM Hopkins)

A few years ago, defying age and wisdom, I borrowed a bike and sped off renewing my youth like an eagles until I wobbled off into a ditch; a wilderness. There, face downward with the breath bounced out of my body enlightenment was given to me! I knew that my cycling days were over! I learned much in that wilderness I discovered yet again that God takes good care of me,–for had I not landed in this ditch rather than on the rocks or in the sea close by? Yes—long live the wilderness, be it wet and weedy as Hopkins described Inversnaid, and very much like the one I tumbled into, or maybe a wilderness of a dry weary land without water, as we visualise the wilderness described by the Psalmist in Psalm 62

One time, in a wilderness of the heart and spirit, hoping to hold on to the coat tails of someone else’s belief, I asked a friend, “Is Jesus alive?” “Is he alive for you?” he replied. I could not answer “Yes,” and my silence was a “No!” in my heart. No comfort was given to me by my friend who wisely recognised that I had to confront my wilderness of unbelief alone. I stumbled along the road home unaware of life around me. I felt that I was trapped at the bottom of a deep miry pit.

In my distress I somehow understood that Peter must have felt like this when he denied the Lord. Peter was later able to give us encouragement on our faith journey: “You did not see him, yet you love him, and still without seeing him you are already filled with a joy so glorious that it cannot be described.” 1 Peter chapter 1 verse 8. Those words were far from my mind at that moment, but it was then, and there, where I felt most lost in a miry pit that I heard in the depths of my being, “This is a holy place. God is in this place and I did not know it.” I cannot describe the joy of that moment. The pit was a wonderful place to be! I wanted to dance and to sing – but I did not want to leave this wilderness where I had been given such joy!

There are great lessons to be learnt in the wilderness. For 40 years the Israelites wandered in the wilderness being moulded into the chosen people of Yahweh. As they entered the Promised Land, Moses reminded the people: “In the wilderness you saw how Yahweh carried you, as a man carries his child all along the road you travelled. You are a people consecrated to Yahweh your God; it is you that Yahweh our God has chosen to be his very own people.” Yahweh speaking through the prophet Hosea said of Israel: “I am going to lure her and lead her out into the wilderness and speak to her heart.”

Today we hear of how Jesus was driven by the Spirit into the wilderness. At his Baptism Jesus heard the words: “You are my Son, the Beloved, my favour rests on you.” With these words ringing in his ears, the Spirit immediately drove Jesus out into the wilderness. There Jesus had time and space to come to terms with the mind blowing knowledge of how much he is loved, and to understand what it meant for him to be ‘the Beloved.’ Once Jesus had plumbed the depth of the Father’s love, the temptations could be faced and rejected as worthless options to the reality of that amazing love.

Filled with the power of the Spirit, Jesus returned from the wilderness to Galilee His message to the people was “Repent, and believe the good news!” “I ask myself what do I need to repent of and change this Lent. Do I need to change the way I relate to others in my life? Do I truly love others? Do I love myself? Do I love God? Do I allow God to love me? Do I know at heart level that I too am ‘beloved?’

The good news that Jesus asks us to believe is that God loves us. It is easier to believe this at head level rather than at heart level. Perhaps during this Lent, I may find space and time to let God ‘speak to my heart’ so that I may come to believe in the depth of my being, the good news of God’s great love. Maybe for a short time each day I can find a few moments to sit still and just let God love me.

LET YOUR GOD LOVE YOU

Be silent. Be still. Alone. Empty. Before your God.

ay nothing. Ask nothing. Be silent. Be still.

Let your God Look upon you That is all.

—Sr Marie Tighe wrote a moving account of the impact of her own ill health in the SCO in August last year which can be read at http://sconews.co.uk/feature/31022/honouring-the-gentle-art-of-being-done-good-to/